NO SLEEP SINCE BROOKLYN

Meet Brooklyn Kwatinetz, the brand new release from Jeff Kwatinetz and wife Natalie. She arrived this morning, weighing in at 7 lbs. 1 oz. and measuring 19 inches. Daughter and parents are all healthy. Reports that Brooklyn has already commissioned 15% of a neighboring newborn's binky couldn't be confirmed at presstime. Mazels to the family.