A WEAKEND PLANNER THAT GOES POW, BANG, BOOM, POP!

OK, kiddies, here’s the haps on this long holiday weekend. You will notice that the bulk of the stuff is on the Fourth of July itself. We have loaded (we ARE loaded) this Weakend Planner full of all the cool events taking place in your area, plus all the more relevant stuff—like all the cool alcoholic beverages you can whip up. We at HITS do recommend caution when you drink. This weekend is all about having fun, but be safe! We are so excited that you’ll notice this planner is kind of half-ass because we don’t care, we’re lazy and we’re really, really wasted. Thankyouverymuch.

Friday, July 2:
Kick things off at the Big Bear Lake Independence Day Festival (42900 Big Bear Blvd) from 10am- 5pm. More than 100 artisans set up booths to sell jewelry, paintings, ceramics, clothing, textiles, photographs and more. Kids keep busy with games, a petting zoo and face painting. Food vendors are on hand to help the whole family refuel for the next round of celebrating. Skip work today and start celebrating this holiday early.

Catch the Warped tour on its last day in Fullerton. Great bands, including The Early November and Coheed and Cambria

In the music spirit? Got some free time? Go pick up the new album by The Killers, Hot Fuss (Island/IDJ); the perfect pick for your 4^th of July activities. Definitely a HITS recommendation, if that means anything. (Dude, we can’t even see straight. God knows how we have the balls to even attempt to make recommendations).

7 p.m.
July Fourth Fireworks Spectacular: This event is always amazing. Fireworks and music at the Hollywood Bowl. It doesn’t get any better than that. It’s always hard to get into, but if you have tickets, it should be amazing. We suggest leaving early due to traffic. You can always park and ride a shuttle for $5. Check out the Hollywood Bowl’s website (www.hollywoodbowl.com) for locations on where to get the shuttle.

9 p.m.
Go get Wasted at Frank N Hank’s (518 S. Western Ave). This dive bar is so cool, so cheap and it’s got an awesome jukebox, electronic dartboard and a pool table. Another great bar to check out is the Red Lion Tavern (2366 Glendale Blvd @ brier ave), which is a beer garden in Silverlake. There really isn’t a more beautiful kind of garden. They even have Jagermeister on tap. Is it weird to want to marry a venue?

Saturday, July 3:
Kick things off on Saturday with the Hootenanny at 11:30 a.m. at the Oak Canyon Ranch. The Cramps, Horrorpops and Supersuckers plus a lot of other bands on three stages.

Get into the holiday spirit. Why don’t you bake a cake? We said, "bake." Here is one we picked out for you. The wave your flag cake. It says it takes about four-and-a-half hours, so you better start early. Click here for more info.

San Jose America Festival (11 a.m. to 10 p.m.) Check this out if you are in the area, featuring two events:

Day on the Meadow Concerts
July 3, Noon-10PM
Switchfoot, Camper Van Beethoven, Lit, Sugarcult, Apollo Sunshine, Taming Ingrid, Emaneht, Remoter

America Festival
July 4, Noon-10PM

Lady Bo, Chocolate Watchband, San Jose Taiko, Islands of Fire Dancers
More to be announced. This is the more crowded of the two festivals and it has a 20 minute firework’s show starting at 9:30 p.m. synchronized to a radio broadcast of patriotic, classical and popular music. We have no idea who any of these bands are.

3 p.m.
If you’re in New York, be sure to check out the New York Pops: Hooray for Hollywood! The performance will be at the Central Park SummerStage, Rumsey Playfield. It’s classical, pop/rock music. Actually, we don’t know what it is, but it is happening this weekend and it is free. So if you want to check it out and let us know, that would be awesome. In retrospect, we really know next to nothing.

Sunday, July 4:
Nathan’s Famous Fourth of July Hot Dog Eating Contest (Coney Island Boardwalk)
Got the munchies, buddy? We feel you! Over the last few years, this contest (wolf down as many weeners as possible in 12 minutes) has been dominated by young Japanese Takeru "Tsunami" Kobayashi, who set the world record in 2002 after scarfing 50.5 hot dogs and buns. (His closest competitors, Eric "Badlands" Booker and Ed "Cookie" Jarvis, are three times his size). This is no small event and is treated like an actual sporting event with live ESPN coverage, weigh-ins, online betting and a sanctioned governing body called "The International Federation of Competitive Eating." This is the mother of all hot dog-eating contests and one we recommend highly. Eat at your own risk.

If you aren’t too stuffed, check this site out for more cool ideas on alcohol beverages and food for the holidays.

AmericaFest and Fourth of July Fireworks: If you are in Los Angeles, you should check this festival out. It goes on from 10 a.m.-10 p.m. at the Rose Bowl. We highly recommend this event. We said "high." It features food, shopping, music and a special performance by the Flying Elvi, who are a group of daredevil sky-diving Elvis impersonators. Rad. But we see flying Elvi all the time. Also flying pink elephants and pretty flying fairies, too.

7:30 p.m.
FDNY Fireboat Water Show: Taking place on the East River, north from 23^rd st and south from 42^nd st. Check the local guide for best viewing locations.

8 p.m.
Air Force Fly-Over: Four U.S. Air Force A-10 fighters fly over the city. We can only imagine what a great site this is. Unless you’re too f’d up to remember where you are & get all paranoid when you see a bunch of A-10s flying overhead.

9 p.m.
Check out the Queen Mary Fireworks show (1126 Queens Hwy, Long Beach). Only those who are actually on the boat can witness the fireworks with choreographed music. Make it a night with a pre-show dinner at Sir Winston’s (reservations recommended) or a fast food break for the kids. Your July 4th ticket gets you into the Ghosts & Legends tour plus the rather patriotic prize of a Queen Mary annual pass. There is also a carnival going on all weekend. Check your local listings for the times.

Need a little extra vroom in your holiday head on over to the Fairplex in Pomona for Kaboom! (Gates open at 7 p.m.). Monster trucks going at it all night long, and this can only be described as patriotism in its truest form. The night closes with what is being billed as the biggest fireworks show in Southern California. Sounds like a redneck’s dream, so count us in!!!

9:20 p.m.
Macy’s Fourth of July Fireworks: Over 30,000 shells will be released, which is 55 times more than any other fireworks show. But we still say L.A.’s got better weed. Don’t judge us for our lack of segues.

In case these festivals aren’t your thing, there are two other options. One, grab your swimsuit, sunscreen, a 12-pack and head for the ocean. Two, call up your friends, if you have any, fire up the grill and serve up a main course of hamburgers, hot dogs, BBQ chicken, chips, watermelons and cold ones!!

Monday, July 5
This will be a good day to check out some movies, if you haven’t had time yet or have been too busy getting stoned all weekend long. Here are our picks. Fahrenheit 9/11 or Spiderman 2. Although, it might be cooler seeing them while you’re stoned. We’ll let you know.

POPCULT TOP 10
1. Spider-Man 2: To call Sam Raimi’s sequel the best action comic book movie ever is to damn it with faint praise, considering its only real competition is Tim Burton’s Batman and Richard Lester’s Superman II. Aside from the spectacular set pieces, which dwarf the original’s sometimes-visible blue screen, the plot shares some of the same existential angst marking superior films based on graphic novels such as Ghost World and American Splendor. Peter Parker’s populist contemporary dilemma—he’s forced to moonlight at odd jobs like pizza deliveryman and newspaper photographer in addition to his superhero alter-ego—gives the film its modern slant, along with Raimi’s tongue-in-cheeky humor. Tobey Maguire makes for a soulful, self-reflective wall-climber, and Kirsten Dunst glows with girl-next-door charm, and their on-screen relationship has some real sparks. Alfred Molina brings a wild-eyed scenery-chewing glee to his evil Doc Ock, without ever descending into the over-the-top grotesqueness of Willem Dafoe’s Green Lantern. And the supporting performances are all expertly cast, including J.K. Simmons’ scene-stealing, cigar-chomping newspaper editor J.J. Jameson and Army of Darkness’ Bruce Campbell as an overly officious theatre usher. For once, a box office blockbuster that delivers its weight in popcorn sales. (Roy Trakin)

2. DIG! (Palm Pictures): Reminiscent of Sam Jones’ acclaimed 2002 fly-on-the-wall Wilco film, I Am Trying to Break Your Heart, Ondi Timoner’s seven-years-in-the-making (‘96-’03) movie chronicling the divergent fortunes of Portland bands Brian Jonestown Massacre and Dandy Warhols received the Grand Jury Prize for Documentary at this year’s Sundance Film Festival. The focus is on BJM’s megalomaniacal, blithely self-destructive frontman Anton Newcombe, who forms a kind of Salieri-Mozart rivalry with his opposite number in the Warhols, Courtney Taylor, a devoted fan who eventually surpasses his mentor in commercial success, at least in Europe. Newcombe's refusal to play by the industry rules is constantly juxtaposed with the Warhols' willingness to comply, albeit ruefully and knowingly. The comparison is made explicit when the mincing Taylor sashays in front of the camera in a powdered wig, calling himself "Amadeus." It’s basically A Star is Born indie-rock style, as Newcombe’s overweening ego and delusions of grandeur are ultimately defeated by his own wacky idiosyncracies, not to mention a worsening drug habit. The film goes out of its way to point to Newcombe’s influence, with former BJM members going on to play with such outfits as Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, Beachwood Sparks and The Tyde. And while Newcombe’s descent makes for compelling viewing, the surprise star of the film is the band’s wacky, bushy-haired, mutton-chop-wearing tambourine player Joel Gion, who, in one of the movie’s highlights, is sent to N.Y. to sign the group's recording contract with TVT, where he meets a visibly bewildered Steve Gottlieb. Proof that there are a million stories, one for most every rock band out there, and this is just one of them. (RT)

3. The Terminal: There are worse ways to spend two hours in an airport terminal (where all you can do is "shop," as co-star Stanley Tucci’s by-the-rules custom boss explains) than to hang with a mugging Tom Hanks, reverting to the physical comedy of his Bosom Buddies period. Or, for that matter, Steven Spielberg, who recreated the interior on a desert soundstage where he could use all his favorite security gadgets, TV monitors and ideas of consumerism run amuck (the product placements alone probably accounted for half the film's budget). You know the story: after a revolution takes place in his fictional Eastern European homeland, a barely English-speaking Hanks is forced to fend for himself as he remains in bureaucratic limbo, trapped in an airport terminal by Tucci's bureaucratic martinet. Like Spielberg, who wandered onto the Universal lot as a teenager and set himself up in an office before anyone knew he was there, Hanks makes himself right at home, an uplifting, if obvious, metaphor for the immigrant experience. Many of Spielberg’s pet themes are explored in the gentle film, which makes for a welcome antidote to the bombast of so much of the rest of Hollywood’s summer fare. As good as Hanks is, though, the movie is practically stolen by Indian actor Kumar (Pagoda from The Royal Tenenbaums) Pallana’s feisty maintenance man, who represents the true triumph of the little people as he delights in watching hapless victims slip on his wet floors. (RT)

4. Greendale (Sanctuary Visual Entertainment DVD): Neil Young’s feature-length rock opera is as DIY and lo-tech as much of his folk-rock, filmed with a wobbly hand-held camera and lip-synced by its characters. The surprisingly literal narrative, which is practically word-for-word told by the lyrics on the album, touches on Young concerns like the environment, government censorship, media manipulation, TV news, drugs and the persistence of his hippie idealism after all these years. Unlike some critics, I find at least a handful of the songs among the best of Young’s career, especially the anthemic finale, "Be the Rain." While Young’s polemics are often as fuzzy as the film's images, this homegrown movie, which isn't afraid to make fun of itself, turns out to transmit a pleasantly cathartic buzz. (RT)

5. Film Noir on DVD: This July 6, 10—count 'em 10—releases, and all from one of cinema's greatest genres. In one fell swoop, or rather, one box set entitled Shadows, Lies and Private Eyes, you get five noir classics (buy the set for a very affordable $34.94 on Amazon.com): John Huston's masterpiece The Asphalt Jungle starring the inimitable Sterling Hayden; Joseph H. Lewis' sexy, perfect Gun Crazy with Peggy Cummins and John Dall; Edward Dmytryk's Murder My Sweet, adapted from Raymond Chandler's Farewell My Lovely with a career-making performance by usual '30s crooner Dick Powell as Phillip Marlowe; Robert Wise's taut, existential boxing picture The Set-Up with the weighty, somber Robert Ryan, and Jacques Tourneur's exquisite Out of the Past, starring an artwork unto himself, Robert Mitchum. And if that isn't enough to get you jumping up and down on the bed (the one you won't leave for a week), you can nab Billy Wilder's classic Double Indemnity (one of the greatest of the genre) starring Barbara Stanwyck and Fred MacMurray; Frank Tuttle's pairing of Alan Ladd and Veronica Lake in the gorgeous This Gun For Hire; John Farrow's (Mia’s old man) The Big Clock with cool blue eyes Ray Milland; Robert Siodmak's landmark Criss Cross, starring a hunky Burt Lancaster and divine Yvonne De Carlo, and Roy William Neal's sleaze-a-licious Black Angel, featuring noir's great loser Dan Duryea (no one has a voice like his) and the superlative Peter Lorre. For characters doing such bad, bad things, this is almost too good to be true. There has to be a double-cross, right? (Kim Morgan)

6. The Hamptons: The PlayStation 2 Estate is the place to be this weekend. Paris Hilton launches her record label, Heiress, on Friday. Jay-Z debuts his new S. Carter tennis shoe on Saturday. And, last but by no means least, P. Diddy hosts the annual White Party on Sunday, the 4th of July. This year, he’s outdone himself—he’ll be toting an original Declaration of Independence. What happened to the mandatory bikini wax? We’re sure it will be in full effect. (Valerie Nome)

7. Velvet Underground 3D Death Chase: It’s 1968 and you’re on the way to your bar mitzvah in the East Village, but you get off at the wrong train stop, where you confront a bunch of degenerate art types, including Andy Warhol, Lou Reed, John Cale, Sterling Morrison, Mo Tucker and Nico, wielding hypodermic needles, pills, booze and spray cans, trying to corrupt your innocence. Navigate these mean streets here and you get to the synogague on time to hear a lovely refrain of "Hava Nagilah." (RT)

8. Patti Scialfa, 23^rd Street Lullabye (Columbia): Like Rickie Lee Jones' Pirates, Scialfa casts moments, images, feelings across the water—and let's them swirl to obvious conclusions. Hushing you with its sheer vulnerability, the honesty that comes from seeing how innocent you once were and perhaps pining for that sweetness again, a time when you thought you knew, secure in a knowledge that was nothing. Rocking back and forth, scattered piano notes, gut-string guitar figures swirl and vocals honeyed like Ronnie Spector, yet dreamy like the girl always looking out the window in high school. At times gleeful, at others ruminative, she sets the stage for rainy evenings, humid afternoons that won't end and breaking days full of promise. "City Boys" is everything you want, but shouldn't bother with, while "Stumbling to Bethlehem" offers encouragement among the tripping points that are salvation promised with no avail. The title track is an invitation to a real-life seduction of broken dreams, fallen angels and the merging of sweat-soaked bodies in a stolen moment—delivering at least a moment amid the heat and oppression of the grind. (Holly Gleason)

9. Southern Girls Rock & Roll Camp: From July 26-31, teenage girls will converge on Middle Tennessee State University in Murfreesboro to get their chops kicked up a notch, take workshops on ’zine creating, DIY stuff, live and recorded sound, band photography and most importantly songwriting. With a keynote address from Rockrgrl founder/publisher Carla DeSantis and panelists tackling everything from activism in music to starting your own record label, the revvvvvvolution could well begin here. Run by volunteers—and lending instruments to the young ladies who don't have their own—this is the best $100 an aspiring rock star could drop this summer. Get the girls off the bench and onto the bandstand where they belong! (HG)

10. Music Row Democrats: In the world of uber-conservativism—due in part to the polarization of prayer in school, choice=murder, gun control flying in the face of the Constitution—being a liberal isn't quite as sexy as it is on the coast. But this year, as many of country music's biggest stars co-opt patriotism in the unstated game of commercialism, there's been a recoil. Several very brave industry leaders have banded together to serve as a place that Democrats, humanists and people who want a slightly more conscionable government than is currently in power can band together in the name of increased momentum. Whether they change the ruling party or not isn't even the point. It's about creating a place where the Democratic platform can be discussed and understood from a place of information rather than derision—thereby equipping my kind to be better educated going into the jingoistic dogma that is often the bedrock of country conservatives. Check out www.musicrowdemocrats.com for more. (HG)

PAYTON PLACE
Forget all these namby-pamby film starlets currently clogging our multi-plexes. And please, forget all their hard-luck stories (Winona shoplfiting, Courtney's drug battles, Halle's man problems). If you're any self-respecting fan of the film starlet in all her gory glory, no one holds a candle to the beautiful, later ravaged, Barbara Payton. A gorgeous, sexy, pouty-lipped blonde who starred alongside James Cagney in Kiss Tomorrow Goodbye and Lloyd Bridges in the impressive noir Trapped, her real life was not only stranger, but more dramatic and certainly seamier than any fiction she starred in. Chronicled in her long out-of-print 1963 memoir I Am Not Ashamed (which has to be THE greatest star bio title EVER), Payton tells of a life so tumultuous, you can't believe she got out HALF of it alive. Affairs with Bob Hope and Gary Cooper; violent, troubled marriages to Tom Neal (star of the seminal sleazy noir Detour who later served time for offing his third wife) and Franchot Tone; shoplifting, prostitution (she was arrested in a bar on Sunset Boulevard—so perfect) and loads of drinking—the gal did it all. Even after the book was published, she remained a handful, knifed by a trick, drinking ever-heavily and finally, tragically dying at the tender age of 39 of heart and liver failure. A sad way to go for such a charismatic and stunning star, who participated in, but was nevertheless swallowed up by that monster called Hollywood. Now re-released, you can read this page turner (the book was an inspiration to actress Jessica Lange while she prepared for her role in the re-make of The Postman Always Rings Twice) without having to search every used book store and eBay for a copy. Visit hollowayhousebooks.com and order a copy for a mere $6.39. Money well-spent on a gal who deserved millions for telling it like it is—even if some of it may be made up. Who cares? There will never, EVER be another Ms. Payton. (KM)

ALL THAT SPAZZ
Bob Fosse would not be amused. Come to think of it, neither would Charles Dickens. When De-Lovely, director Irwin Winkler's bathetic ode to that great musical genius Cole Porter opens, an elderly Porter (Kevin Kline) is rolled out by a demanding angel named Gabe (Jonathan Pryce) and given the This Is Your Life treatment. Glumly aping Fosse's beautifully and bizarrely rendered death throttle in All That Jazz with a ridiculous nod to A Christmas Carol, Gabe stage-directs Cole’s life with key members walking out on stage and re-enacting what should be, a fascinating existence. No such luck. Covering, mainly, his sexless marriage (again, sexed-up Fosse would not be amused) to the gorgeous socialite Linda Lee Thomas (Ashley Judd), this biopic loses the fun Porter so desired in life and instead, focuses on the frustrating-how de-lightful. For sure, Porter's life wasn't one constant party. He was gay, though for the most part openly and with jolly, which caused friction in a complicated marriage where Linda was NOT just a beard, but a true companion and a genuine love. He was also, nearly paralyzed after being thrown from a horse, but nursed by the ever patient Linda (later Cole would lose his leg). These milestones bookend a movie that offers little else aside from a terrific performance by Kline (who also sings) and embarrassing, anachronistic turns by modern musicians doing Cole as if appearing on that dreadful TV show American Dreams. We've got Elvis Costello warbling through "Let's Misbehave," Sheryl Crow desecrating "Begin the Beguine" and Alanis Morissette eradicating any of the eroticism of "Let's Do It, Let's Fall in Love." Whoever thought SHE would be the appropriate choice to not only sing, but DANCE, whilst intoning "birds do it, bees do it" was clearly, high—maybe on what Porter got "no kick from"—cocaine. Oddly (but then, really, not surprising when you think about it) it’s British pop superstar Robbie Williams who sings Porter best when raunching through "It's De-Lovely." He's the only one who TRULY appears to be enjoying himself and, even better, in an impish pan-sexual way Porter would appreciate. If you're a Porter fan, you'll file through all the movie versions of songs you love—Fred Astaire's "Night and Day" (from The Gay Divorcee), Ann Miller's "Too Darn Hot" (from Kiss Me Kate), Frank Sinatra and Bing Crosby's "Well, Did you Evah?" (High Society), just to name a few—wishing you were watching those. And though Porter aficionados will appreciate the film's greatest contribution—Cole Porter's own little voice singing "You're the Top"—you still have to wait for the end credits to enjoy this delicacy. And by then, it's just too darn…long. (KM)

TRAKIN’S PICKS TO CLICK
Spider-Man 2 (Columbia Pictures)
Premise: Sequel to the blockbuster with Peter Parker this time battling the nefarious Doc Ock and trying to reconcile his superhero persona and live a normal life at the same time.
Stars: Tobey Macguire, Kirsten Dunst, James Franco, Alfred Molina, Brooke Adams, Dylan Baker, Rosemary Harris
Director: Sam Raimi does the honors once more, with a screenplay credited to Oscar winner Alvin Sargent, with contributions from novelist Michael Chabon.
Thumbs Up: Nothing less than the best action comic book movie of all time.
Thumbs Down: Will in-theater bootleggers take a bite out of what looks like a record-breaking box office? Nyah…
Soundtrack: Columbia/Sony Music Soundtrax album features singles by Dashboard Confessional and Train, as well as songs especially created for the movie by Jet, Yellowcard, Maroon 5, Taking Back Sunday, Smile Empty Soul, The Ataris, Ana Johnson, Jimmy Gnecco f/Brian May.
Website: www.spiderman.sonypictures.com/

Before Sunset (Warner Independent Pictures)
Premise: Sequel to 1995 film Before Sunrise in which an American author once again meets the woman he met and hung out with for a single night nine years ago in Vienna, only this time in Paris.
Stars: Ethan Hawke, Julie Delpy
Director: Richard Linklater (School of Rock ,Slacker, Waking Life, Dazed and Confused, Before Sunrise)
Thumbs Up: Charming characters share their deepest feelings about life and love… What could be bad?
Thumbs Down: Talk, talk, talk…
Soundtrack: Milan Records album features songs by Julie Delpy, Lou Christie, Kathy McCarty, The Scholars Baroque Ensemble, Kathy Bloom, Igor Kipnis, Loud and Harald Waiglein
Website: www.beforesunset.com

The Clearing (Fox Searchlight)
Premise: A wealthy executive is kidnapped by a disgruntled employee and held captive in a forest, where his wife must deliver the ransom to free him.
Stars: Robert Redford, Willem Dafoe, Helen Mirren, Matt Craven
Director: Pieter Jan Brugge in his feature debut.
Thumbs Up: Redford and Dafoe dueling in the forest could make for some psychological sparks.
Thumbs Down: A top-notch cast for what appears a low-budget genre film.
Soundtrack: Varese Sarabande album features score by Craig Armstrong.
Website: www2.foxsearchlight.com/theclearing/

De-Lovely (MGM)
Premise: Biopic of famed composer Cole Porter, who looks back on his life as a big stage production, with his wife the co-star in the unlikely story of a gay man who married and fell in love with a woman. Featuring contemporary pop-rockers doing Porter tunes.
Stars: Kevin Kline, Ashley Judd, Jonathan Pryce, Natalie Cole, Elvis Costello, Sheryl Crow, Mick Hucknall, Diana Krall, Alanis Morisssette, Robbie Williams, Lara Fabian, Vivian Green
Director: Irwin Winkler (Life as a House, At First Sight, Night and the City), with a screenplay by Jay Cocks (Gangs of New York)
Thumbs Up: Kevin Kline in an Oscar-worthy turn and engaging, Fellliniesque-style musical performances.
Thumbs Down: Is Winkler merely doing a watered-down Bob Fosse? And whoever said a producer could direct?
Soundtrack: Columbia/Sony Music Soundtrax features Williams ("It’s Lovely"), Morissette ("Let’s Do It [Let’s Fall in Love]"), Crow ("Begin the Beguine"), Costello ("Let’s Misbehave"), Krall ("Just One of Those Things"), Green ("Love for Sale"), Cole ("Ev’ry Time We Say Goodbye") as well as Kline/Pryce ("Blow, Gabriel, Blow"), Judd and Porter himself ("You’re the Top")
Website: www.mgm.com/DeLovely/