WEAKEND PLANNER MAKES ONE LAST TRY TO GET IN BIKINI SHAPE

This is HITS, so you’ve gotta assume any plug is a shill, right? For the most part, mebbe, but this time we really, REALLY mean it. The band of the year (although nobody knows it yet) is playing the Avalon Tuesday night, bringing the first day of summer (unless they changed the date this year) to a powerful climax. In case you haven’t been paying attention, the band’s name is Spoon, they’re based in Austin, and they have something very special going on. Show of the week? You betcha. But it could very easily be more than that, as Brit Daniel, Jim Eno and their bandmates hit the stage behind the brilliant new album Gimme Fiction (Merge) just as they’re about to reach critical mass. If you saw the Amoeba in-store last month, you know what we’re talking about when we predict that this show is gonna be godhead.

CALENDAR
Friday, June 18
3:30 p.m.
Schools Out, & So Is the Trial! Go ahead & pack up the kids’ overnight bags… Sleepovers @ Neverland Ranch are a go! B.Y.O. Jesus Juice.

6:00 p.m.
Iron and Wine at Webster Hall: Amazing singer/ songwriter. Sounds like a good night of tunes. (125 East 11th St., NYC)

7:15 p.m.
Los Angeles Film Festival screening of Hustle & Flow: A big buzz film at recent festivals, (starring: Terrence Howard, Anthony Anderson, Taryn Manning, DJ Qualls, Taraji Henson, Ludacris) this surprise screening is @ DGA Theatre 1. The festival runs thru 6/26. For Info: www.lafilmfest.com

7:30 p.m.
Batman Begins: If you haven’t seen this movie yet we strongly recommend it. Little known up & comer Katie Holmes is in it.

10:00 p.m.
20/20 (ABC): Elizabeth Vargas takes an exclusive look inside the ever-controversial spiritual movement, Kaballah. Does the extent of your knowledge on Kaballah lie in the red string bracelet you purchased at Kitson? You might wanna tune in. You can also check out www.radaronline.com where the first of four installments dissecting the subject appears written by Mim Udovitch. Claiming ,among other things, that Kabbalah Centre founder Philip Berg & his wife Karen, who’ve tried to tear Kabbalah away from its Jewish roots, have used Craigslist to solicit freelance ghostwriters to help the Bergs write “scholarly” books on Kabbalah. Yikes. And … how much they payin?

Saturday, June 19
11:00 a.m.
Coffee Talk Producers (L.A. Film Fest): Meet filmmakers in a relaxed setting where they discuss their craft. Featuring: Peggy Rajski (Home for the Holidays, Bee Season), Michael Nozik (The Motorcycle Diaries, Quiz Show) & Michael Shamberg (Get Shorty, Erin Brockovich). @ DGA Atrium (www.lafilmfest.com)

Festival of the Horse @ the Museum of the America West: Much has been said about the spiritual connection between a horse and his rider. Well, it’s been awhile since we rode a horse so we can’t tell you. However, if you want to know why this connection happens, and other cool facts about horses and how they affected different groups in the west, check out this event. Or if you have a weird horse fetish … this event will also be good for you.

12:00 p.m.
Tutankhamun and the Golden Age of the Pharaohs: Opening this weekend at LACMA. From 1976-1979 the Treasures of Tutankhamun exhibit toured the United States, attracting more than eight million visitors and inventing the phenomenon of the blockbuster museum show. A larger selection of items from the famed Pharaoh's fabulous tomb goes on a 27-month U.S. tour, introducing a whole new generation to the golden treasures of Egypt's Valley of the Kings. Wow, this sounds awesome. A 27 month tour … what does this exhibit think it’s Cher?

3:00 p.m.
Spanglish: A surprisingly good rental. Had no desire to see this, watched it last night and laughed out loud (tragically rare for a judgmental/bitter/surprisingly single girl like me) and cried throughout. Cast: Adam Sandler (I know, I know), Tea Leoni (so great), Cloris Leachman (amazing) & Paz Vega (kinda looks like Penelope Cruz but can act!)

7:00 p.m.
VH1 Classics Present: Rock Never Stops, featuring Cinderella, Ratt, Quiet Riot & Firehouse: Oh my! These rock/metal giants from the ’80s want you to Come On Feel The Noise! Tix: $44. @ The Greek Theatre. (www.greektheatrela.com)

8:00 p.m.
Vivian Green at the Roxy.

9:45 p.m.
New York Doll (LA Film Fest): Much-talked-about flick following Dolls bassist Arthur “Killer” Kane, whom director Greg Whiteley found 30 years after his attempted suicide living in L.A., where he’d become a a born-again Mormon dreaming of a band reunion. @ DGA Theatre 1. (www.lafilmfest.com)

Sunday, June 20
Fathers Day: If brunch w/your dad isn’t a possibility (and we say, why do the obvious?), here’s a suggestion for the ladies. Why not hook up w/a random fella, have unprotected sex and get knocked up with his baby? Then, next year…have brunch with him on this special day! Cool, huh?! You can thank us later.

3:00 p.m.-6:00 p.m.
Real Men Cook at Exposition Park Community Center: If you're a foodie looking for a place to sample over 150 dishes, score some free food and drinks, and hang out with celebrity cooks like Judge Joe Brown, Shang and many more, then you've hit the motherlode.

5:00 p.m.
Stolen (L.A. Film Fest): A film delving into the mysterious world of stolen art focusing on the 1990 art heist at the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum in Boston—the largest art heist in American history, resulting in the loss of 13 of the world’s most famous works, worth $300 million. Cast: Blythe Danner, Campbell Scott, Harold J. Smith. @ Laemmle Sunset. (www.lafilmfest.com)

6:00 p.m.
Game 5, NBA Finals (ABC)

8:30 p.m.
The Sunday Show @ O’Brien’s Irish Pub: Really good bunch of comics do standup for you and yours at this free show (where they’ve got Stella & Guinness on tap—beat that, biyatch). (2941 Main St., Santa Monica)

Tuesday, June 21
8:00 p.m.
Spoon at the Avalon Hollywood!

Cindy Alexander,Garrison Starr & Saucy Monkey @ The Troubadour (all ages)

8:30 p.m.
Eddie Pepitone & Sean Conroy & others @ the Fake Gallery. This super-strong team of comics you’ve seen on TV have put together a night of great stand up, sketch & videos with other folks you’ll recognize from TV. Tickets: $5. @ 4319 Melrose Ave., near Heliotrope.

Sneak Preview: Dredg @ the Henry Fonda Theatre, Friday, 6/24 @ 10:00 p.m.

JE-C’S NEW MOVIE RUNDOWN
Batman Begins
Starring: Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Liam Neeson, Katie Holmes and Gary Oldman
Synopsis: Bruce Wayne has been seeking vengeance since childhood for his parents' deaths. He heads to the East, where he trains with ninja Ra's Al-Ghul and his aide, Henri Ducard. Upon returning to Gotham, Wayne finds his city terrorized by crooks and the Scarecrow, and is disturbed to discover that the villains are working for his former mentor, Al-Ghul. Only his one-time flame Rachel and Lt. James Gordon think the metropolis can be saved. To do so, Wayne transforms into Batman.
Thoughts: This movie opened Wednesday, and I was there. All I have to say is, WOW. I guess I would even go as far as saying it may even be better than the Tim Burton Batman. Also, I heard rumors that they have signed on for two more movies and are already shooting. GO SEE THIS MOVIE!!!

The Perfect Man
Starring: Hilary Duff, Heather Locklear, Chris Noth and Mike O'Malley
Synopsis: Holly Hamilton is tired of moving every time her mom Jean suffers a broken heart at the hands of some second-rate loser. With her mother on the brink of dating yet another zero, Holly takes action, conceiving the perfect plan for the perfect man: an imaginary secret admirer who will romance Jean and boost her shaky self-esteem. Holly's plan begins to unravel, however, when Jean becomes smitten with her mystery man. With no choice but to produce a suitor, Holly borrows her friend’s charming and handsome Uncle Ben as the face behind the e-mails, notes and gifts.
Thoughts: CHICK FLICK ALERT!!! CHICK FLICK ALERT!!! I HOPE I DON’T GET DRAGGED TO THIS MOVIE BY MY GIRLFRIEND.

HOLLY’S CORNER
Bruce Springsteen, Born to Run (1975): When was the last time you surrendered—just flat lay down and gave it all up—to the Phil Spector-esque majesty and glory of Springsteen's breakthrough masterwork about the heroic losers and no ones railing against the daily indignities who're caught between the gears of the grind and the urban desolation of invisibility? The way the melodies surge and press, the way bravura arrangements that build to dizzying temples of glory, the lyrics that are barbed-wire knots that clip inside and leave you reeling with the rusty details that make it all too real, Clarence Clemons' sax blowing a slightly torn elegy for the moment, is a reason to believe in music's transformative power. Yes, the title track was the rev-'em-up, incite-'em-to-jettison-the-shackles-to-make-it-happen hit, but "Thunder Road" was the romance full cauldron boil—a nd the stark echoing of "She's the One" is romantic possession of the most acid-etching sort. Long before The Sopranos made HBO a destination for the slice of real mob life, "Meeting Across the River" cast it in High-8 cinema verite with Roy Bittan's right hand wandering the top end of the piano. And—for those blessed with the Side 1 and Side 2 reality of LPs—each act's closer was a benediction of shot-through with the urgency of fetid merging, one demi-yet-full-immersion sexual, the other the passage of gangs and groups, but both are haunted, sweat-soaked and open-throated witnesses to friendships forged by fire—friendships that are so burnt in they last in the fire-pitch of one's soul even when the actual relationships fall away.