WHAT’S UP DOC?

Lipflappers are in overdrive over what's going down at Warner Music Group, though there seems to be as much misinformation as honest-to-goodness facts about the situation in the wake of AOL's acquisition of Time-Warner.

Despite all the chatter, don't look for a merger of Atlantic and Elektra.

With the corporate mandate to grow marketshare, this one's not gonna happen, folks.

And despite early-retirement packages being offered to non-contract employees at WMG, don't believe reports that veteran gunslingers Russ Thyret and Howie Klein are on the list and among those headed for the exit.

Rumblings have WMG czar Roger Ames trying to keep Thyret aboard at least until the scheduled 2002 arrival of Tom Whalley.

There's still plenty of talk inside the Bunny over how long Thyret will actually stay at the party, though.